Unemployment Rocks

Η ανεργία είναι ευλογία

Διαβάστε το άρθρο “Η ανεργία είναι ευλογία”, από το pitsirikos.net, στα Αγγλικά.

Unemployment rocks!

According to new data from the Hellenic Manpower Employment Organisation, unemployment in Greece is constantly increasing and there will soon be a day when all the Greeks will do nothing else but enjoy the amazing climate of our beautiful country and philosophise like our ancient and glorious ancestors did.

In November, the number of the unemployed that were registered in the Hellenic Manpower Employment Organisation registries was 786,236, but I can assure you that the actual number is at least 786,237, since I myself am unemployed, but I am not registered because I refuse to be included in the rabble.

The positive thing is that the number of the long-term unemployed has fallen by 1,827. They are probably dead.

The mass death of the unemployed is the only chance for unemployment to decrease, since there is no possibility for new positions to be created, because businesses simply do not need employees anymore.   

Also positive is the number of dismissals, which has also fallen by 25.36% compared to that of the last month, but this is due to the fact that we cannot get fired every month.

However, when everyone gets fired, dismissals will be completely eliminated.

Among the registered unemployed, 41.97% are men and 58.03% are women, so this is the best time to get a girlfriend.

64.02% of the registered unemployed are between 30 and 54 years old, so it is clear that the time has come to get our pension in our 30s in order to enjoy life without wasting time in looking for a job that does not exist and will never do.

Concerning education, the vast majority of the unemployed that are registered in the Hellenic Manpower Employment Organisation have finished school or hold a university degree, whereas only 1.15% of the unemployed are uneducated, so we can safely conclude that, if  you are completely illiterate and dumb, you will definitely get a job.

(The people who are actually unemployed are so many that they currently comprise the most prevalent social group in Greece and they could take matters in their own hands; but it doesn’t cross their mind. They prefer to look for someone who can take advantage of them. If you are a sheep, you will definitely find a shepherd. And Easter is near. Baa, baa, black sheep!!!!)

Πηγή: pitsirikos.net/2012/12/η-ανεργία-είναι-ευλογία